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About Us? There is no us. It's just really about me. Me, myself, and I. Yes, I'm single. Statistically speaking, I'm a divorced white female living alone. I've
lived alone 36 years of my 57, from birth to present in a single state.
This website was born out of my own frustrations over my singleness and coming to a point of embracing it rather than fighting it. Fate has dealt me blow
after blow in the love department. Twice divorced and alone again. As far as my failed relationships, yes, I've been to counseling to learn why I make poor
decisions and have gotten that matter out of the way. Nevertheless, I am normal, just single.
The name "JustOneSingle.Com" came from that wonderful restaurant experience of hearing, "Just one?" I'm here to cry to the world I'm not JUST one! I'm
not a mere insignificant human being! I count! (At least my vote does.) But in this world I can hear Dean Martin crooning to me, "You're nobody, 'til
somebody loves you. You're nobody 'til somebody cares." I love Dean's voice, but not everything sung is necessarily truth. I am somebody and so are you!
How do I feel about singleness? Here are my thoughts on the matter starting on the down side:
Here are my positives (hum..my list is shorter):
My faith keeps me from going crazy. If I can't talk to God about how I feel, who can I talk to? Thank God I can breathe a prayer when I need to.
Wherever you find your strength to live single, I wish you the best. One observation I've made in building this site is I find tons of help for single women in
books and online articles, but very little help for single men. Are men handling this better than women? Guys, tell me what your struggles are besides
cleaning your own toilets, and I'll gladly include them along with any references. Perhaps we'll add a Just for Men tab as we grow. Everyone, feel free to
send me your tips on how to make JustOneSingle.Com a better site for all.
Oh, and by the way, just wanted to let you know, you ARE somebody important and valued, you are not just a mere, single, insignificant human being. And
most important, you're not alone!
Vicki
lived alone 36 years of my 57, from birth to present in a single state.
This website was born out of my own frustrations over my singleness and coming to a point of embracing it rather than fighting it. Fate has dealt me blow
after blow in the love department. Twice divorced and alone again. As far as my failed relationships, yes, I've been to counseling to learn why I make poor
decisions and have gotten that matter out of the way. Nevertheless, I am normal, just single.
The name "JustOneSingle.Com" came from that wonderful restaurant experience of hearing, "Just one?" I'm here to cry to the world I'm not JUST one! I'm
not a mere insignificant human being! I count! (At least my vote does.) But in this world I can hear Dean Martin crooning to me, "You're nobody, 'til
somebody loves you. You're nobody 'til somebody cares." I love Dean's voice, but not everything sung is necessarily truth. I am somebody and so are you!
How do I feel about singleness? Here are my thoughts on the matter starting on the down side:
- Things are too heavy. I leave the 24-count of bottled water in the trunk of my car and drink them as I need them. It takes me 5 minutes to drag the 40-
pound bag of dog food to my apartment. I'm sick of carrying the groceries in by myself. - The garbage is always there for me. Nobody takes it out except me. When it stinks I get motivated.
- I need to trust men to fix my car. I don't appreciate the oil changes, the tire rotations, and the "what is it that needs replacing"? I buy AAA because I
can't change a tire and don't know how to jump myself. - I don't get my 10 meaningful touches a day. UCLA research states that to be emotionally and physically healthy I need to be touched 10 times a day.
So I bought a dog to at least have something hairy to touch, but she never pets me in return. - Being single is bad for my health. University of Texas tells me I'm more prone to heart disease and dying young, so I'm exercising on a regular
basis to prolong life. - Loneliness can kill a person. Been there, felt that, and strangely still alive.
- I live close to the poverty level because I don't have a two-income household, but I still have to pay the same electric, cable, insurance, Internet
connection, gas prices, etc., and nobody gives me a discount. - Uncle Sam punishes me in taxes due to my singleness.
- Last I read I have a one in 60 chance of finding a husband at my age and 74% chance that my third marriage will fail.
- According to a study by AARP (www.aarp.org) 64% of women my age haven't been hugged or kissed in over six months (make that three years for
me in the kissing department). - I have to do EVERYTHING by myself: travel alone, eat alone, sleep alone, drive alone, go to the movies alone, etc., etc., etc.
- It's dark and lonely when I go to bed at night and my feet are cold. I have nobody to spoon with.
- I've had to learn to be a "miss fix-it" or it stays broken.
- I have to love myself so I have the motivation to take care of myself. Nobody is here to say, "you go girl!" and give me encouragement.
- My future scares me and the thought of dying alone depresses me.
- There's nobody here to take care of me or comfort me when I'm sick.
- I keep all my troubles to myself and don't share intimacy with anyone.
- I have to support myself in every way imaginable - financially, physically, and emotionally.
Here are my positives (hum..my list is shorter):
- I don't have to share my money with a husband.
- I can make ALL my own decisions and suffer the consequences for them. Nobody else to blame if I screw up.
- I can go where I want and when I want and not have to ask for permission.
- I can shop till I drop on my own credit cards.
- I don't have to be hurt again in the love department - thank God!
- I can have all the peace and quiet I want, when I feel like I want it.
- I can decorate with flowery items rather than with NFL emblems, NASCAR flags, or dead animal heads.
- I can move anywhere I want without having to consider somebody else's desires.
- I can choose my career paths freely because I'm not involved with anyone to hold me down.
- I can learn to grow and mature and use this time in my life to gain wisdom.
- It pushes me to reach out to others, even though it's easier not to.
My faith keeps me from going crazy. If I can't talk to God about how I feel, who can I talk to? Thank God I can breathe a prayer when I need to.
Wherever you find your strength to live single, I wish you the best. One observation I've made in building this site is I find tons of help for single women in
books and online articles, but very little help for single men. Are men handling this better than women? Guys, tell me what your struggles are besides
cleaning your own toilets, and I'll gladly include them along with any references. Perhaps we'll add a Just for Men tab as we grow. Everyone, feel free to
send me your tips on how to make JustOneSingle.Com a better site for all.
Oh, and by the way, just wanted to let you know, you ARE somebody important and valued, you are not just a mere, single, insignificant human being. And
most important, you're not alone!
Vicki
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"Solitude never hurt anyone. Emily
Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote
some ofthe most beautiful poetry the
world has ever known...then went
crazy as a loon."
Matt Groening, The Simpons, Spoken by Lisa
Simpson
Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote
some ofthe most beautiful poetry the
world has ever known...then went
crazy as a loon."
Matt Groening, The Simpons, Spoken by Lisa
Simpson
